Nice Day

I still like using this blog. I know Lon said it doesn't count no more and it's okay but I'll keep using it anyway. The year has gone by quick. I really can't believe it's May already. It seems like only a few weeks even though it's been nearly 8 months of school. Crazy. I just thought, it's going to be quick, I'mma be a 12th grader soon. I'm not sure if I'm staying for my senior year though. I don't know. But that's why I'm trying to spend some time with all the people I love in Furness. And I think I've gained quite an influence. I can't exactly say change of heart but I feel like I've gotten more nicer or something. Maybe too nice to that point where anyone can take advantage of me, hah. Well not that overly nice but you get me. And I think I've been doing better in academics. Better grades! Although procrastination hasn't stopped. I still haven't started on my notecards. I mean I did found some stuff I could definitely put in the note cards but that's really nothing, lol. I want to start this weekend though.

Time to TANNNNN! Goodbye pale-white skin, hello golden bakiness. lol. I need to dye my hair. A lighter color of course. Golden brown and I guess bleach a part where it's look pretty nice. I'll get Linda to help me since I have to dye hers too.
I think I broke a bone. Too sure of it. Well it'll take 6 weeks for the bone to heal, as far as I know from my studies. So it'll be until June 20 something when it'll be all better. Aw. It wont be in a cast but just a small splint. you wouldn't even notice if I had it. Then again it could be in a relaxer shoe where of cuourse you'd notice and stuff. I need to get my work permit and workready papers in.

Blah #7

I hate the stupid PSSA science!!!It pisses me off so much. Especially yesterday. But today I actually did it well. Lol. But still hate it because most of the time i get lost. I now realized science probably shouldn't be my thing...At least not a major. Lol, I love it though.

I miss Mr. Nap! Although Lon hasn't taught us yet. but still. His band's music is pretty good. Admiration! haha.

Actually I really wanted to talk about monday, about how I was real pisses & wanted to cry & whatnot. but I think I should move on. I didn't get to go, I can't do anything about it.

The macbook sucks. Not worth $1000. But it's pretty. But the functions are gay. GAY! Okay...I type horrible here. lol.

I don't feel good right now. I hate that. RAWRRRRRR. Lol, Alix is behind me. I don't think she likes the bacbook much either. She's not really using it much...I think.

Blah #7

I hate the stupid PSSA science!!!It pisses me off so much. Especially yesterday. But today I actually did it well. Lol. But still hate it because most of the time i get lost. I now realized science probably shouldn't be my thing...At least not a major. Lol, I love it though.

I miss Mr. Nap! Although Lon hasn't taught us yet. but still. His band's music is pretty good. Admiration! haha.

Actually I really wanted to talk about monday, about how I was real pisses & wanted to cry & whatnot. but I think I should move on. I didn't get to go, I can't do anything about it.

The macbook sucks. Not worth $1000. But it's pretty. But the functions are gay. GAY! Okay...I type horrible here. lol.

I don't feel good right now. I hate that. RAWRRRRRR. Lol, Alix is behind me. I don't think she likes the bacbook much either. She's not really using it much...I think.

blank

Yesterday I checked up on Ms. Nelson. Well, it's not exactly checkin' up but more like stopping by and chat for a bit. I told her I couldn't really decide if I should go to Alvin's viewing because I really wanted to. See, my 5 year old brother wants to go to Sesame Place and my family wants me to go cause I never with them. They want me to go to the viewing because they know that I'll start my day off very sad & crying. The same day, today we're suppose to go Sesame place. If I'm sad and I'm going to a p[lace where we all should be happy and having fun as family, that may ruin it. And I don't want to ruin it for my brother. There's an event in Sesame place for autistic kids and my brother is one of them. Ms. Nelson, she told me I should go to Sesame Place and spend the day with them, skip the viewing. She said Alvin would want me to be with my family and be happy & whatnot. Nobody ever said that to me. And I think she's right, alvin would've wanted that. He's the type that doesn't want to be a burden to anyone. So I feel less bad for skipping. But still a bit sad. I think he'd want me to to keep my head up right now & don't be too sad. My prayers are with him though, definitely. R.I.P. Alvin.

Alvin's Memorial

The memorial was actually pretty nice. Although it did made me shed a few tears, it's okay. I don't feel as sad as before. Or traumatized. Time heals us all. Well...I suppose it does so for some of us. Alvin's family, you can tell they tried holding an expression to not show that they're actually sad as (or mad) as hell. That's why his father cried while trying to make a a little speech. I feel better that I came to the memorial for Alvin. So maybe I may not go to the Viewing. I can't say I know him enough to go to the viewing. And of course that means I'm not coming to the funeral. But was thinking to have a quick visit for the viewing. I can't decide but I think I'll make up my mind soon. I think I'm still traumatized by sunday. That's probably why I feel like I want to go his viewing just so I wouldn't think of it anymore. I don't know.
I hope Ms. Nelson recovers from that tragic day. Eversince, I've been seeing her look as though she cried not long ago or taking it pretty hard. It's not all pity here, and I guess you could say that I worry a bit. Even Julie...But even more I could tell the family took it worse. That's their kid, you know?

Shoes! & Some Nice Shirt

So I've just done some online searching on some shoes I may want to buy. I definitely don't have the money to buy these all, so I need to choose. Sucks. But yeah, I think they look cute.

Tragedy hits...Again

This morning my cousin sent me a text message asking if i heard the bad news. she was saying something about how sorry she felt she didn't visit "him" friday. It was 4am, I was sleeping so I just went back to sleep. I looked at it more when I woke up for school. I knew something bad happened. It was obvious. My grandfather, my mom's dad passed away last night, during his sleep. I know my mom wouldn't take it too well & I didn't she knew yet so I kept quiet. I told my dad and uh...He probably was not listening. Well, he's no morning person so yeah. When I came back home from school I found that my mom was crying. Figures. One of my aunts or my grandmother told her. I was the only one really comforting her. She got over it quick. I can't say much about this. I mean, I never shared a moment with my grandfather. He didn't even remember me like that. Or talked to me for that fact. It's sad anyway. And I see there may be more commotions from the family. About...money. Sigh.



Update : 11:53pm
I was right. More commotion. More like drama. Why can't we all be at peace for a moment? Why have all this...Very shitty, I must say. Actually I'm not sure if I can look at my family (especially my dopey aunt) the same way anymore.